For anyone who doesn't know what we have gone through with my grandma in the last 15 years, let me bring you up to speed. 15 years ago, on my 13th birthday, my pap passed away. It was a horrible time for our family. He was a wonderful man who is truly missed every day by all of us and his passing really tore us all apart. When he died that left my Grandma all alone living in a big farm house taking care of a farm. Of course we all helped her out, but it was still a lot for her to be there by herself. So after a couple of years we moved her in to an apartment in a senior living complex. She had her own kitchen, living room, bathroom and bedroom. She was living on her own but there was help there if she ever needed it. And one day she did. Seven years ago she fell, so she pulled one of the ropes for help. When they took her to the hospital she coded and I believe with every part of my being she should have died that day. That was how the story should have ended, but it didn't. With medical intervention they brought her back and she was never the same again. She had the beginnings of Alzheimer's and couldn't go back to the apartment to live on her own anymore. So she went to live in the assisted living - nursing home part of the building. Year after year her Alzheimer's disease got worse and worse. I was lucky enough that she was able to come to my bridal shower and my wedding, but she wasn't herself. And as time went on she didn't know who any of us were, couldn't even remember that she had been married or had children - let alone her grandchildren. So my Grandma has been "dying" for the last seven years, so no, this was not an "unexpected" death, but yes, the timing really stinks with Em's wedding this week. And for the record, just because a death is expected that doesn't make it hurt any less. Its funny all this time I felt like I was completely prepared for when she passed away, I mean we really haven't had her around for such a long time. But I'm not. I'm not prepared to go to the funeral home tomorrow night and see her laying in a coffin. Even when she had no idea what was going on, you could still go visit her and she would talk to you and laugh with you - then ask you the same three questions for the next hour.... haha
This is a link to her obituary.
And now for some happy memories of my Grandma! I might have to add a few new blog entries as I think of more but Em and I were having a lot of fun remembering things last night and I just wanted to share some of it!
- My Grandma was crazy about word search books! She would keep lists of which ones she had already bought and done. And I always thought it was funny how she wouldn't circle the words, she would draw a line straight through it. Even when she was sick, mom would still get her word search books and she would write notes in the margins. I doubt she ever pulled the books out and read the notes after she wrote them, but they were there.
- Em would always bake pumpkin pies with her. And Em always laughed about how Grandma would measure every ingredient down to the grain of sugar. hahaha What makes that whole thing even funnier is how much I am like my Grandma. She rarely cooked and we all know I don't cook! But she did bake on occasion and when she did she was such a perfectionist just like I am!
- There were always lots of birds around my grandparents house. My pap always put up bird feeders and liked to watch them out of this huge picture window they had. Every time a bird would tweet Grandma would always say listen, its saying "pretty pretty pretty"! Em and I think about that every time we hear birds to this day!
- She hated to sit at home. Another way we are so much alike. We used to make all kinds of excuses to have to go to town. And she LOVED Walmart! She used to say we had to go to Walmart so that the people there wouldn't miss her and think that something happen to her.
- She loved to talk on the phone. I remember as a young teenager hanging out at her house and wanting to go upstairs and have a private conversation on the phone in her bedroom. She would ask probably 10 times - you know how to use the call waiting right. Make sure you answer it if somebody calls!
- She genuinely cared about people. She was a nurse all her life. A traveling nurse. She would go to houses that were in the middle of the ghetto to take care of people and she wouldn't even bat an eye at the thugs on the corner. Usually they knew her name and would tell her hello! That's just the impact that she had on people. When she retired her and my pap delivered meals for Meals On Wheels. Em and I used to go with them when we were off from school. She would just make those peoples whole day/week I think!
- Every year on Thanksgiving my cousin Amber and I used to go with my grandparents to deliver Thanksgiving dinners to less fortunate families for the church. That was always a really happy memory of mine. We would go in to all their houses and everyone would always be watching the parade on tv and they were always so happy to see us. A lot of them wouldn't get to spend the day with family so we were the only ones they got to see.
- She used to write with her toes! hahahahaha Only my family will understand this I think! She would take her shoes and socks off and put a pen between her toes and try to write with it. Its one of those you had to be there moments, but hysterical all the same!
- Along the same lines, she used to balance a spoon on her nose! haha
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